How not to book an escort,world championships!

[BibiofLeeds]

Yes this winds me up too and I don't reply.If people can't send a sensible to the point text I can't be arsed trying to coax them one feckin text at a time.Just moronic timewasters.
Can you imagine setting up a hairdressing appointment like that?
Another pet peeve of mine lately is people calling over and over again..I'm not working ffs..if you read my profile you would have gathered I'm probably not working as it says I only sometimes work weekends and require 24 hours notice..so by all means try once or even twice on the offchance but when it get's to call 4 or 5 time to call another hooker maybe?!?

[Rosie13]

Yes this winds me up too and I don't reply.If people can't send a sensible to the point text I can't be arsed trying to coax them one feckin text at a time.Just moronic timewasters.
Can you imagine setting up a hairdressing appointment like that?
Another pet peeve of mine lately is people calling over and over again..I'm not working ffs..if you read my profile you would have gathered I'm probably not working as it says I only sometimes work weekends and require 24 hours notice..so by all means try once or even twice on the offchance but when it get's to call 4 or 5 time to call another hooker maybe?!?

The numerous calls drive me mental, "she didn't answer sixty seconds ago and hasn't rung me back so I better try again..." No. No. No.

[LadyOfTheNight]

I'm sure I've heard from this guy before nick of 8inchtrousersnake, original or what...

Hiya how are you I'm James I'm stopping in a hotel in arundel this evening and I was wondering if you was avaiable for alittle fun?

No I don't do free fun, I get paid 

[Scarlettxoxo]

I think my LEAST favourite way someone has booked me before is by placing a booking request from 1am(!!!) on a saturday morning until 11am on sunday morning...

THAT is what he thought an overnight was, since it's TECHNICALLY "only one night spent sleeping"

before he placed the booking, he emailed me 20 times, all within a half hour, said "r u free rite now, ovrnite for 500"


I really, really hate my job sometimes.

[BibiofLeeds]

Even worse than constant callers...I text one bloke who kept ringing today who had then texted asking if I could let him know when I was next available and told him I wasn't working today and as per my ad I require 24 hours notice for weekends.He then texts asking if he can just ring to ask me something so he can book for Tuesday or Wednesday!How about fuck off you ignorant pushy arsehole?!?
My other favourite texts today has been one offering coke,mdma or weed and some div who asked who I was then followed up with that he knew who I was and did I remember him..ah yes I remember people just from their random numbers.So glad I wasn't taking bookings today they sound like total weirdos!

[Red KB]

Yes this winds me up too and I don't reply.If people can't send a sensible to the point text I can't be arsed trying to coax them one feckin text at a time.Just moronic timewasters.
Can you imagine setting up a hairdressing appointment like that?
Another pet peeve of mine lately is people calling over and over again..I'm not working ffs..if you read my profile you would have gathered I'm probably not working as it says I only sometimes work weekends and require 24 hours notice..so by all means try once or even twice on the offchance but when it get's to call 4 or 5 time to call another hooker maybe?!?

I have an autotext reply advising I am not available and won't be answering until the following day etc...Guess what? I still get them calling repeatedly. I think they don't understand it was an automatic response and I must have sent it so must be answering.

[BibiofLeeds]

Yes I think you would have to put 'This is an automated text' at the beginning and you would still get them ignoring it.

[bristoljen]

Message on my phone this morning, can I come round now!!! Yes darling you left the message at 5am, I am waiting all dolled up and ready to go... not.

[mature helen]

Received this email from AW.


You look gorgeous for 58. Do you fancy an hour with a 38 year old lad? I think we would have a great time??xx


When I read it all I could think was how does a (middle aged) MAN of 38 get off calling himself a lad?

[Shewolf]

Received this email from AW.


You look gorgeous for 58. Do you fancy an hour with a 38 year old lad? I think we would have a great time??xx


When I read it all I could think was how does a (middle aged) MAN of 38 get off calling himself a lad?

Because he is a knobhead  all knobheads are 'lads'...same type of thing as being a 'cheeky chappy'. They're probably the apple of their mother's eye.

[mature helen]

Because he is a knobhead  all knobheads are 'lads'...same type of thing as being a 'cheeky chappy'. They're probably the apple of their mother's eye.

Yes you're right. What a knob! lol 

[VoluptuousCurves]

Idiot: Are you available today?
Me: Yes, I could see you from 2pm onwards. How long do you want to visit for?
Idiot: 15 mins.
Me: OK that's ?50 and it's oral and HR only, not full sex.
Idiot: Not full sex? [always love it when they repeat what you say like a fucking echo chamber]
Me: Yes, you'd need to book a half hour appointment for full sex, it's ?80.
Idiot: Erm, I'll have to call you back.

Half hour later I get a text:
Idiot: Will you do full sex and that for ?70?
Me: Nope

I've actually just gone and taken quickies off my rates, seems to attract the cheap-arses.

[Red KB]

Yes I think you would have to put 'This is an automated text' at the beginning and you would still get them ignoring it.

It does start with "AutoReply:"!!!

[BibiofLeeds]

It does start with "AutoReply:"!!!

See and they still ignore it haha!

[Jill]

See and they still ignore it haha!

My aw email has an auto response too which very clearly and with no chance of getting it wrong, a polite statement that I do not reply to emails if they are a new or enquiring client.  With clear advice on how to connect with me you would think it is foolproof.
Most of them adhere to this but there are always a few who think they merit a reply. They have a long wait.