The precious moments before a client arrives.

[Lynny]

I had to laugh about the month just gone, as I have had a couple of episodes of things happening or going wrong just before my client arrived.

They include:

1. Period started early! Deeply embarassing, plus guy had travelled to see me because he couldn't meet when I recently toured his area.
2. Suddenly needed a poo, this happens quite a lot!
3. Family/friend with urgent news, having to lie and say you are working in Sainsburys until 6pm and NO don't come round!
4. All my neighbours seemed to start congregating in the hallway, it's been like Piccadily circus in my block this month.
5. Ladderd my stockings, romoving from suspenders and having to hook it all together in seconds!
6. Some weird sewer drain smell keept kicking up, smelling like I had a poo even though I hadn't!
7. Held up in traffic trying to get back to my place, no parking, rang client to say sorry not there yet!

Luckily everything seem to go fine and the clients were understanding or not bothered in the slightest, not funny at the time though!

So does anyone have any other stories of inconvenient happenings in those last final moments?

[Pink~Princess]

The word poo cracks me up, I don't know why. Especially when Rubyroo says it, she calls it pooh lol.

Anyway yep Ive had all of those things in the past too, my next door neighbour in particular never seems to sleep and is in and out all day and nite long. If I didn't know better I'd think she was a prossie too lol.

xx

[amy]

I'd once just got off the phone giving a client who'd arrived my hotel room number when I decided to have a quick drink of water because my throat was dry. When I went to put the glass down it slipped out of my hand, hit the cabinet edge and broke just as I went to grab it and slashed my thumb open (which then started bleeding everywhere as thumbs do ).

Fortunately the client was a regular and helped me wrap it up in plasters and tissues but it was sore for ages and I spent the next two days in that room terrified in case there was a tiny piece of glass on the carpet that somebody might stand on in their bare feet or something. I think I've probably done all of the above too apart from 3 and 7 (the neighbours in the hallway one is far and away the worst).

[happyhappyjoyjoy]

I always seem to need to poop before I see a client too have no idea why (probably better out then in lol) This could be a problem when I work from hotels so I bought poo pourri and it really bloody works! http://www.amazon.com/Poo-Pourri-Heaven-bathroom-freshner-masking/dp/B001D08800 you spray it in the toilet before you goi and it stops any poop smells! lifesaver!

[Lynny]

Yeah! What the hell is going on with the pooping thing? It happens on tour more so,  but still whenever at my place and someones about to arrive, it's like hello, you need a shit all of a sudden! Despite trying to use the toilet in advance. It's still a right pain in the arse!

[KaylaCouture]

No matter how long in advance I booked the appointment, I wait until the absolute LAST minute to start getting ready Which of course leaves no room for any mishaps, or last minute poos for that matter

Those last few minutes when a clients waiting out in his car, I'm always frantically racing through my apartment, stopping in front of my mirror every few seconds to finish makeup, and yelling at my boyfriend to "go, now!!!" because HE'S racing around trying to gather his keys and find his phone...*sigh*
Its like, i've had hours to prepare, why are we doing this all the last minute!!

[Dexi Delite]

Even if I've been for a poo, say half an hour beforehand I still want to go just before the client arrives.  Must be nerves.

[Cassidy Star]

Totally nerves I think.  I do exactly the same Dexi.  I go beforehand, and half hour before a meet, I need to poo.  Then I need to shower all over again - undress, redress, such a pain.

Unless I just hold it in !!!!

[Pink~Princess]

I always seem to need to poop before I see a client too have no idea why (probably better out then in lol) This could be a problem when I work from hotels so I bought poo pourri and it really bloody works! http://www.amazon.com/Poo-Pourri-Heaven-bathroom-freshner-masking/dp/B001D08800 you spray it in the toilet before you goi and it stops any poop smells! lifesaver!

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaha x

[India597]

Yeah! What the hell is going on with the pooping thing? It happens on tour more so,  but still whenever at my place and someones about to arrive, it's like hello, you need a shit all of a sudden!

Lol this is so true! Funny thread 

[amy]

Totally nerves I think.  I do exactly the same Dexi.  I go beforehand, and half hour before a meet, I need to poo.  Then I need to shower all over again - undress, redress, such a pain.

Unless I just hold it in !!!!

What on earth are you eating if you have to shower after poop? Apart from one memorable occasion when I got food poisoning in Egypt and pretty much fake tanned both legs on a panicstricken sprint to the bathroom it's never quite got to that, and lord knows I've eaten some rum stuff .

[CaraMxx]

Hahaha Amy thats so funny!

Everyone gets the 'sharm sh*ts' in Eygypt! 

[TattooLucy]

Yes i would agree about the poo thing.

although i would say im more nervous about the client not showing than anything else. Although this reminds me.. i need to buy some febreeze

[casey_kisses]

So apparently I'm the only escort in the world that doesn't do the nervous poo thing...

[Dani]

So apparently I'm the only escort in the world that doesn't do the nervous poo thing...

No I am with you on this one.  Mind you that's because the amount of meds I take mean I rarely go anyway.

I must be super organised and never thought I was as I am always ready in plenty of time for the client. I never seem to have accidents or last minute rushes.  The only problems I have ever had was when three times in two months the new people upstairs flooded my apartment as the did not plumb in the waste pipe to their washing machine so when they did washing the waste flooded out and down into my lounge hall and bathroom.  They wont make that mistake again!!!
I guess I am lucky as I don't have problems with neighbours, my Landlord has never visited me.

I don't get nervous before bookings anymore unless it is someone who I have seen before but not saved their details as it could be someone I don't want to see ever again