Client with Asperger Syndrome

[Aqua Allegoria]

Ladies

Has anyone seen a client with the above?
Should I say yes, should I say no? I told him to call me since I honestly don't know what to reply. Obviously don't want to offend. I'm more interested in how to deal with this sort of client if I decide to go through with it, make them comfortable etc.

Thanks everyone xxx

[Lady_Lust_XXX]

You really need to find out in what way his illness affect him.  There is so many different things with aspergers that we can't be expected to know them all and each individual is unique.

Just ask him and tell him you will factor things into the booking.

[Fabulassie]

I'm sure I've seen clients with Asperger's - it was only recently that it was given a name. It used to just be called "a bit odd." The character Sheldon Cooper on Big Bang Theory is (unofficially) based on Aspergers and you'll see him do a lot of typical Aspie things.

My brother is pretty much classic Asperger's - but he's 50 years old and there was nobody to diagnose it when he was growing up. What I can tell you to expect may include a sort of physical stiffness and awkwardness. They are often not cuddly people and hugging them can be a bit like hugging a coat rack. It's a bit weird but nothing alarming. Aspergers generally means they don't pick up on subtle social cues like disapproving glances, etc. so they also can do odd things that other people may consider graceless or rude, like pick their nose in public or something like that. (That's my brother!) They may talk in a monotone drone, not recognising that their audience is bored or uneasy as they go on and on about steam trains or The Who (my brother!) or whatever their particular interest is. Jokes and sarcasm may go over their heads and they will take what you say at face value.

That he has told you this about himself means that he is aware of these issues and hopes you will work with him on them. Therefor, you can probably get away with correcting any inappropriate behaviour. He may appreciate being told if he is kissing you poorly. I mean, if a guy licks my ears I will probably try to find a way to distract him before I actually tell him not to do that. I think with someone who is telling you up front that they have this issue, they may be prepared for/used to/appreciative of being told - nicely but directly - that something they are doing isn't working for you.

You may find the booking tedious and awkward but I don't think there is any particular reason to be afraid or worried.

[Kay]

I've seen a couple and they were fine, in fact very pleasant. But I would perhaps speak with him on the phone to try and gauge if you'll get on OK in person.

The main thing is, they fail to pick up on social cues, so are not so interested in chatting. And they may have a very fixed idea about what they want to happen, so you need to check that you will be able to provide what they're looking for.

[Fabulassie]

Good point, Kay. Many people on the autism spectrum are uncomfortable outside of a routine and may not be good at going with the flow.

[Aqua Allegoria]

Oh thanks ladies, I can handle Sheldons just fine lol!
Xxx

[berri]

I've done some appts with some people diagnosed with aspergers

I have also dated a people with aspergers (i've had a number of people tell me they are surprised I am not diagnosed with it)

Aspies can take things really literally.  And can be difficult to pick up on subtle mesthe es and social cues, in both directions (reading you and the giving out of their own).  Also some people have a total lack of filter - they think it and then they say it.
Many aspies learn the socially expected norms and can therefore just be a little odd sometimes.  Think sheldon and his offering tea to upset people/guests as an example

[alice842]

Yes, definitely talk to him first about it. Everybody with asperger's is different. I remember this quote from somewhere, something like 'If you've met someone who is autistic then you've met ONE person who is autistic' (the most recent DSM-V has merged asperger's syndrome in with autism).

My brother is autistic/asperger's (never diagnosed) and he is quite similar to the way people describe above. He doesn't recognise social cues - if someone is bored/uninterested or in a rush. I think a lot of people with severe asperger's probably struggle with social intimacy so he might not have had much experience so that's worth asking him about.

On the other hand I have an ex-boyfriend who was diagnosed with it and I didn't understand why at all - to begin with. He was very charismatic, outgoing and had a lot of friends. He was diagnosed because he could become extremely obsessive with a certain character (from a tv show, a historical figure) and would mimic them - their clothes, voice/accent, catchphrases.. very much like how a child might become obsessed with a superhero. He also didn't understand the effect his emotions had on other people. I'm not suggesting your client will be like this, just trying to make the point that everyone with asperger's is different

[The_Lynx]

On the other hand I have an ex-boyfriend who was diagnosed with it and I didn't understand why at all - to begin with. He was very charismatic, outgoing and had a lot of friends.

Same as one of my exes, also diagnosed. In his own words, he took a lot of time to observe and learn - think learning animal behavior, but with people instead. A lot of AS folks are above average sharp, doesn't surprise me in the slightest that they can teach themselves social skills if they put their mind to it.

[Aqua Allegoria]

Hey ladies

Yes I've spoken to him and sounds exactly Sheldonish:) which works with me because I've dealt with similar in my circle,just didn't know it was called Asperger. Thank you everyone

[VanessaTS]

My boyfriend have autism and some kids of him asperger, and they are totally normal, but with superior intelligence, the only problem is they have low social skill to make friends and that... but they have..

[Lucy xx]

Hi girls, I have a guy who has started coming regular and from the start I felt he had Aspergers but obviously never said anything. He's since told me he does have Aspergers but I think he's slightly further along the autistic spectrum than I originally thought or that he would admit.

He's got nasty on a couple of occasions if he's been told what to do or if I change the routine, and takes things very literally.

He had such a panic the other day when I told him my hair was falling out. I meant plenty of it ends up on the sheets and carpets, not that I was literally losing my hair!

Any advise on how to deal with him? He's a sweet guy so I'm happy seeing him, just need some advice on keeping him happy, like his routine etc 

[Kay]

One of my former autistic clients called me yesterday - and completely denied that we'd ever had any contact before! He just kept sounding perplexed then said OK and put the phone down. (I wouldn't have seen him again anyway because he was a bit too weird for me, with halitosis...)

[roseanna]

On the other hand I have an ex-boyfriend who was diagnosed with it and I didn't understand why at all - to begin with. He was very charismatic, outgoing and had a lot of friends.

Same as one of my exes, also diagnosed. In his own words, he took a lot of time to observe and learn - think learning animal behavior, but with people instead. A lot of AS folks are above average sharp, doesn't surprise me in the slightest that they can teach themselves social skills if they put their mind to it.

If they put their mind to it. I know a family that has three of them, all brothers. There are three sisters as well but they don't have it, it's very much a male thing. Two of the brothers are socially okay although a little bit odd at times, but the third doesn't pick up on social graces at all. He will communicate by texting people in the same room, and doesn't understand at all why people find that funny. He will also start off conversations with you as though he's never met you in his life before. They are all definitely above average intelligence and the one I'm talking about will usually come up with a solution to any problem within minutes. As clients they aren't really any more difficult than anyone else. It's usually quite easy to get them off into a world of their own and not have to make polite conversation etc.

[Emma_C]

I had a guy a couple of days ago who I think was trying to push for BB. It was obvious he had Aspergers or some other mental issue. He kept texting me afterwards saying he didn't understand why I got offended. I just ignored him. He tried to book me again the next day.  I found him quite manipulative
"hope you've not got the wrong impression of me". Telling me it was his birthday. He takes ages to come  Saying people don't usually pick up on his Aspergers & some people think he's a confrontational prick! A few pestering texts afterwards. I just gave him a mouthful about not pushing escorts boundaries & safety etc. He came across as really shy & respectful at the start. He was apologetic when I told him I wouldn't get close to his bare dick as I straddled him to finish him with my hand but there was that still underlying factor that he was being manipulative that was a major red flag for me.

I'm not sure weather to leave feedback or not for him. I wouldn't see him again. I know another local escort cancelled his booking.