A lot is being made of the fact that he will no longer trust you and that it will be a lot to deal with for him, however I feel that the real deal breaker is that he described the job as disgusting.
He is essentially intolerant of something which - as you said is unfortunately stigmatised. I understand that parents may find it difficult to understand but I do truly believe that a compatible partner needs to be tolerant and accepting of of the job as a matter of character and belief system.
You did the decent thing in choosing him over the job and I really sorry that he found out but, as painful as his ensuing rejection is - it should open your eyes to the fact that he may not be the man for you.
I definitely think it should be a case of you rejecting him rather than vice-versa. You are far too good for him and you deserve someone who can get their head around an unconventional temporary vocational choice.
Obviously it's easy for me - who has no emotional investment in this situation to pipe up about what you should do - I just think you should use this blow to recognise a serious flaw in his character.
There has been a lot of discussion about boyfriends and honesty and although you'd probably love to go back in time and erase the escorting (or the evidence of it) and keep the man, think about it this way: if you had a friend or relative who was escorting and he found out and called her disgusting would you be happy to be with him?
It's a really sad and tough situation and I wouldn't wish it on anybody but I really think you should tell him that his actions and reactions have disappointed you and that he may not be the man you thought he was (accepting, tolerant, non-judgemental, supportive, understanding) and that you would rather let him be with someone 'pure' and 'chaste' who will never offend his sensibilities) Escorting, whether you do it now or have done it in the past or know someone who does it is just a job - and anyone who thinks it is a justifiable reason for derision and disdain is a lot less of a person than they purport escorts to be.
Look at all the women on here - we are not disgusting we are intelligent, independent, brave, people who choose to do something that society tells us is unacceptable. He embodies that very society.
I have to come back to the fact that you chose to stop because you knew he would not accept it. It was a selfless decision. You sacrificed a job you liked (although the judgement of others would have meant you would never do it full time) for someone you came to feel strongly for. He needs to do the same- sacrifice his strong feelings for you.
The fact that he cried meant it hit him hard and that he maybe had high hopes for the both of you.... and you know him better than we do.
Just think about what you both deserve. Try, at least, to keep it amicable.
Stay strong
Topic: Mm (Read 5753 times)