Relationships whilst escorting?

[M]

Susan - if a client told me he wanted to date I would think automatically he just wants a free ride. The only way to try to ensure that's not the case would be if you were to not have sex with him for a decent enough period of time (say a 3 month 'probationary' period or something like that) to hopefully clear up that he's not using you. I would say this would be very difficult esp. on his end as it would be a case of him figuratively going from walking to crawling instead of the other way around - to go from a 'relationship' that started with and was based on the sexual to now being platonic I think would be an enormous feat for most men.

In my research before doing this I remember coming across a piece where working girls were warning newbies not to fall for it when clients tell them they want to be their boyfriend because the only reason they want them as a girlfriend is to get free sex and no longer pay.

[MissThang]

Lets get that can of worms prised open 

I'm guessing we all fall roughly into one of the following categories..

1) In a relationship, partner knows about job
2) In a relationship, partner doesn't know about job
3) Single (This is mine)

And I have questions for all three, because I am "the nosiest person who ever snooped the face of the earth" (according to everyone else) or "fascinated by other people" (according to me)

1) Is your partner genuinely comfortable with what you do?
2) Do you worry about getting found out?
3) Would you get into a relationship while you are working? How would you approach the subject?

I'm finding that working is making me not want to be in a relationship. For me, it requires a degree of detachment from other people. But then what happens if I meet someone really fit? 

Anyone wants to share their thoughts, please do...

[BaudelaireGirl]

I was with my partner before I started escorting (although not for long) and he has been incredible. He supports me, made my website and give me advice on underwear for clients! Sometimes he does get awkward, but we avoid this by not going into intimate details about bookings and me having a separate room to work in aside from our bedroom. He knows that come about 5pm I am entirely his. Obviously everyone is not the same, and I know a lot of girls say they would not want to be with someone who is okay with it, but it works for me! I think it does help that we were mates for about 5 years before getting together. I only post this (I have talked about it before on this forum) to hopefully show you can have a good relationship and escort as I think sometimes it must feel impossible.

Ruby

x

[Amy1989]

Hey

I'm am just starting out and I'm married. My hubby knows my intentions. We use to swing and have a very open relationship which I think helps.

Hubby is quite happy,  and knows that Ill hopfully enjoy what i do.

[Princess]

I have been escorting on and off for 6 years now and I used to always keep it a secret from my partners, getting found out a few months later and all the waterworks that came with it so I stopped.

Now, I have been doing it part-time for 3 years and my current partner knows about it. He supports me and drives me to outcalls and just wants to make sure I am safe. I only offer incalls when he is at work, like Ruby come 5pm he knows its just him and me. He ensures me he has no problem with the job as its the oldest profession in the world and I pay my taxes so won't get in trouble lol. My family and friends nearly all know, but I have a full time job as well. These are the people I don't want to know.

[Ellie_e]

I was single for 3 years prior to starting working and always thought I would remain single while working in the industry, and if I did get a man I wouldn't tell him

However, best laid plans can go awry!  A few months after I stared working I met a guy...I didn't plan on dating him and he didn't know any of my other friends so I told him about my job.   He's OK with it, surprisingly so.  He's 38 and I think guys that aren't in their 20s generally have a bit more perspective and are more open-minded.
The funny thing is that he would really hate to see me flirting or similar with another guy if it wasn't work related.

I think the key is to be strict about the boundaries ie. when you are with your partner, they should have your full attention.

Sometimes it can be difficult sexually - if you've been giving clients head all day then there will be times when the last thing you want is to come home and have another willy that wants attention...!!

[Cat_BBW]

1) In a relationship, partner knows about job
2) In a relationship, partner doesn't know about job
3) Single


1) Is your partner genuinely comfortable with what you do?
2) Do you worry about getting found out?
3) Would you get into a relationship while you are working? How would you approach the subject?

In the first section, I'm number 1.

In the second section, my replies are:
1) Not completely, but he's happy as long as I'm happy and safe, and he's happier since I started doing duos with a friend of ours (because of the safety, not the perving, lol)
2) No, but I'd rather my private life wasn't local knowledge. Wouldn't really want my family to know, but I could prolly make good excuses as to why I do it.
3) can't really answer that, as I'm already in a relationship (which I was in long before I started whoring)

[BaudelaireGirl]

Sometimes it can be difficult sexually - if you've been giving clients head all day then there will be times when the last thing you want is to come home and have another willy that wants attention...!!

So very true!

[Friday]

Happily Married. Partner knows and is very involved. We don't escort together I don't know how I'd feel about that but pics, movies, the odd cam occasion. He's very hands on 

[Cat_BBW]

Happily Married. Partner knows and is very involved. We don't escort together I don't know how I'd feel about that but pics, movies, the odd cam occasion. He's very hands on 

I'm trying to persuade Mr CatBBW to join me on cam and movies and pics. So far he's been too scared!

[Holly T]

My ex knows what I do for a living and during the relationship he was very supportive although I'm sure it was hard on him.  I told him what I did before it got serious to give him a chance to walk away without getting hurt as I thought it would be easier than finding out in other ways.

Since the relationship ended I miss that support and feel almost (but not quite) jealous of the ladies here who have husbands/partners that know about the job.

As it is, I'm single now and I'm not particularly interested in getting into another relationship any time soon.  Every relationship I've had has caused my social life to suffer somehow and I'm now enjoying being able to spend more time with friends and having them over to watch the latest NFL games with a glass of wine.

And although I don't have a 'significant other' in my life just now I worry about being 'outed' still - I've had clients that work with a relative here and so far they haven't seen any resemblance yet it's still often in the back of my mind.  "What if I mentioned something similar to what he may have mentioned at the office?" kind of thing.  So far so good so I'll just count my blessings and carry on.

[ladyjennaj]

I have tried being in a relationship where my partner knows what I do, and it really didn't work. I was disappointed, but...also kinda relieved. I don't want a boyfriend who is happy with what I do, but also...how dare he ask me to stop? A man couldn't win with me, so single is better 

[Friday]

Happily Married. Partner knows and is very involved. We don't escort together I don't know how I'd feel about that but pics, movies, the odd cam occasion. He's very hands on 

I'm trying to persuade Mr CatBBW to join me on cam and movies and pics. So far he's been too scared!

Get him involved behind the scenes first. Get his opinion on things. Ideas for movies etc 

[Cat_BBW]

Get him involved behind the scenes first. Get his opinion on things. Ideas for movies etc  

Yep, that's the route I'm taking, but I've started at the PICS opinions and suggestions...and he still doesn't want to play  

[KirstyPink]

I have tried being in a relationship where my partner knows what I do, and it really didn't work. I was disappointed, but...also kinda relieved. I don't want a boyfriend who is happy with what I do, but also...how dare he ask me to stop? A man couldn't win with me, so single is better 

Exactly!