A client, who says, "I don't drive".

[katrina]

Just to add: The non driver escorts wouldn't have experienced this phenomena because a lift is out of the question anyway. Its about *some* clients feeling self entitled actually.

Imagine if I rung the hairdressers for example, made an appointment then said "I don't drive how do I get to you!?"

[VoluptuousCurves]

Just to add: The non driver escorts wouldn't have experienced this phenomena because a lift is out of the question anyway. Its about *some* clients feeling self entitled actually.

Imagine if I rung the hairdressers for example, made an appointment then said "I don't drive how do I get to you!?"

Yes!! In what universe would that be acceptable? (Spoiler: None!)

[katrina]

Exactly Katrina. If the client can afford to pay my hourly rate and is adult enough to book an escort, surely they can sort out their own transport!

I have experienced this type before that want you to hold their hand through every fucking part of the booking process
"Can I park there, where can I park, will I get a ticket, is there number plate recognition, what if the number plate recognition goes wrong somehow?" (This last one was seriously asked me last week! I said "Have you ever experienced number plate recognition failing at a car park?" He said "No." I said "So why are you worrying about it? If the barrier doesn't go up then you just press the button to speak to an attendant." Jesus  )

I now tend to assume that when they come out with shit like this, they expect you to run around like a bloody PA sorting out their parking/transport, maybe coming out to meet them if you're in a hotel, all for the pleasure of their company and god forbid you should have any other clients you might want to think about, you need to drop everything NOW and see them!

When I've actually ended up in a booking with guys like this it has always been a miserable experience with them either pushing boundaries or chatting shit that winds me up, or - my personal bete noire - counting out the money really slowly into your hand like you're too stupid to add up. Bitch, I worked in a cash office for years and I'm really fucking certain I can count notes faster than you can. Oh and when they do this, the chance of them trying to short you increases by about 50% in my experience.

When they start coming out with this shit now I just tell them to call me back when they've had a look on Google maps and worked out how to get here. They never do.

Yes I agree with all of this, we've got em sussed VC     These type of clients would be happy for me to literally piggy back them into my place! And yes when you tell them to look it up on google maps funny how they never do get back to make a booking!

[BibiofLeeds]

Just to add: The non driver escorts wouldn't have experienced this phenomena because a lift is out of the question anyway. Its about *some* clients feeling self entitled actually.

Imagine if I rung the hairdressers for example, made an appointment then said "I don't drive how do I get to you!?"

Actually yes we do still get asked for lifts because they just presume we drive.I have had several clients both new and regular ask for me to pick them up from the train station or meet them at the bus station or what have you.
A cheeky twat is a cheeky twat and that's regardless of if he drives or you drive or not as the case may be.
The sort of bloke who asks things like this would never be actually be turning up anyway let's be honest.

[VoluptuousCurves]

Actually yes we do still get asked for lifts because they just presume we drive.I have had several clients both new and regular ask for me to pick them up from the train station or meet them at the bus station or what have you.
A cheeky twat is a cheeky twat and that's regardless of if he drives or you drive or not as the case may be.

The entitlement is strong!

[BibiofLeeds]

The entitlement is strong!

My answer to any bollocks like this is 'Would you expect a  hairdresser to come and pick you up from the station for your appointment the first time you go see them?'
'Er no..'
It's just another silly timewasting thing and probably half the guys that ask for things like this actually do drive anyway!

[Aqua Allegoria]

My answer to any bollocks like this is 'Would you expect a  hairdresser to come and pick you up from the station for your appointment the first time you go see them?'
'Er no..'
It's just another silly timewasting thing and probably half the guys that ask for things like this actually do drive anyway!

A bit like me with my "restaurant" comparison. If you like Italian don't go book Chinese.

As to the rest I'm a bit "shell shocked" here. Or, if you want to spell it properly it's probably N A I V E. When they tell me they "don't drive" and I tell them how to get to me by cab/transport/walk, that's it. I'm sorry if I sound selfish or rude or whatever but it never even came across my mind that they were suggesting I would pick them up. And I think because it's fucking cristal clear to them that I have no intention of picking them up. I mean: if there ever was a client trying to hint at me picking them up, the hint was just lost on me. I didn't even get it. That's because the idea of picking up a client is out of my universe. Try another solar system, my dear.

I talk to them and give them the *next door* post code. I do my best to have an excellent location, easy access, free parking if there's one nearby.
The moment they start moaning about not being able to get to me I say "oh I'm so sorry, maybe next time I'm in your area" Then I block. That's because some people will always complain, no matter what and I am not that patient.

[RR]

I didn't get my licence until my mid twenties, but I couldn't imagine life without my car now. I would sooner drive to town than get the train (and whinge about parking costs - one day I'll learn). That being said, most of my clients drive to me as I have never really had city centre accomodation; I've never liked the pricing, and I've traditionally lived a short 10 min drive away from the centre with free parking on my street.

Some clients take public transport. It doesn't really bother me how you get to me, just don't be a nuisance about it. I had a relative who was a driver but post stroke lost his licence because of how it affected him; there's plenty of people who can't drive for medical reasons, so I don't judge. Plus, cars can be incredibly expensive - car tax is going to go up, petrol costs are a fair boot in the balls when you fill up, and I'm lucky that my insurance is only a few hundred a year because I have a clean licence. I've jinxed myself now, but add points or a collision onto that, your insurance will start to creep up. It probably costs me about ?350 a month to run my car, if I include putting aside money in case something went wrong with it (my car is on finance).

So a client without a car potentially has more disposable income...? Swings and roundabouts really, but its a matter of perspective.

[Luciexx]

Yes, that's true.  Will see how it goes.   

[Lucie268]

It tends to be a bit of a faff when the client isn't driving, just because they're less precise on times but with correct planning, everyone should be on time using public transport (obviously a lot of clients aren't). It surprises me the amount of adult men who can't use Google Maps properly.

Thats reminded me, a client yesterday morning, new to me, older gentleman. He got a taxi here so gave him the usual instructions. We were chatting about traffic and isn't it hard to park, etc. He asked me if I had a car so I said yes. He said "Oh afterwards could you drop me off in town?"

There was a good 10 seconds of silence before I tilted my head to one side and said "No I will not do that. I can order you a taxi though." I managed to refrain from adding "You cheeky old git", for which I give myself a good 500 points.

He then took a shower at the end of the booking. I said "You can use any towel from the stack", he said Oh it's okay I've brought my own. Fine, a few punters do. He was in there for 20 minutes, shouted me because he couldn't work out how to turn the shower off, and when I went in he was drying himself with a roll of kitchen paper  He'd literally used half a roll of that jumbo stuff that's supposed to double as a cleaning cloth.

Once he'd gone I went in the bathroom and there was water fucking everywhere. Also he didn't like my cat so he's never coming again.

Fuck I hate working from home.

This is giving me rage flashbacks. I have a hand towel right next to the sink and sometimes they will use great big rolls of the toilet paper and make a huge mess getting bits everywhere. And I still don't get how they manage to flood the floor sometimes after a shower.

[Mirror]

Some used to grab my damp, old towel which had marks on it from when it accidentally encountered bleach.

Once a realised I made a point of telling them, no not the tatty towel, use the clean fresh one just for you.

[Lucie268]

Exactly Katrina. If the client can afford to pay my hourly rate and is adult enough to book an escort, surely they can sort out their own transport!

I have experienced this type before that want you to hold their hand through every fucking part of the booking process
"Can I park there, where can I park, will I get a ticket, is there number plate recognition, what if the number plate recognition goes wrong somehow?" (This last one was seriously asked me last week! I said "Have you ever experienced number plate recognition failing at a car park?" He said "No." I said "So why are you worrying about it? If the barrier doesn't go up then you just press the button to speak to an attendant." Jesus  )

I now tend to assume that when they come out with shit like this, they expect you to run around like a bloody PA sorting out their parking/transport, maybe coming out to meet them if you're in a hotel, all for the pleasure of their company and god forbid you should have any other clients you might want to think about, you need to drop everything NOW and see them!

This bothers me so much too. I've had some get lost and then ask specifically 'do I take a left now? a right?'. Or 'I'm on X Road where do I turn?' as if I'm supposed to have knowledge of all the streets in my neighbourhood. But this goes for both drivers and non-drivers. Honestly, I don't think it makes a difference in reliability, what with traffic and parking being so tricky nowadays. I've managed most of my life so far getting around on public transport and it just takes a bit of planning to get somewhere on time.

[VoluptuousCurves]

It's about giving yourself enough time to get somewhere and allow for delays. There will always be unexpected delays - if you're on the Tube there might be a line closed; if you're in a car there could be traffic; even if you're walking there could be road closures for a street protest!

I always ask when booking "If you're running late or need to cancel, please just drop me a text or quick call to let me know." I've actually decreased no shows (but increased cancellations) since starting to say this. Which is a bit depressing when you realise that some guys need to be prompted to have the common courtesy to tell you they can't make it