What you say v's what you mean

[Zaracoope1983]

just some of things we say that aren't strictly correct:

A couple of mine are "noooo you're not tiny, most men fib about their dicks, honestly it's better for me because it tends to hurt me, besides, my god you know what you're doing!!". In my head it's "my god are you sure the doctor cut the right cord, not sure how this will work, I'm a big girl and that is tiny, seriously not sure if anything is in but he seems happy so something must be happening"

[cherryfcuk]

i'm studying language at the moment, and it's quite interesting how we communicate. usually people expect us to read between the lines...
we speak in metaphors and we all have a unique was of processing the world, so it's no surprise this is how your brain reads between the lines and makes sense of this statement.

[sweetmilf]

I have got one regular from EE (I would not name the country for discretion).

He says about V in a very outspoken and downright straight manner.  Quite refreshing whilst initially, I thought "oh no....no...."

[VoluptuousCurves]

I have got one regular from EE (I would not name the country for discretion).

He says about V in a very outspoken and downright straight manner.  Quite refreshing whilst initially, I thought "oh no....no...."

About V? What does this mean?

"I think you've made a mistake here darling, it's ?20 short of my fee" = "You cheeky twat, do you really think I'm too stupid to count?"
"Wow, what a nice big cock" = "FFS, I was hoping for a little one"
"Don't suck my clit darling, I'm really really sensitive!" = "Do you think this is an audition for Dyson, fool?"

[Quinn]

"Did you want a shower before you go?" = Pleeeeease leave already!

[Pretty Pink]

''Oooh I didn't know it was you, did you get a new phone'' = oh no iv been duped, can't stand you!!

If I 'orgasm' in 2 mins.. Mmm that was lovely, I owe you a very good return = your hurting me and you wouldn't stand a chance if I left you there all day you clown.

'Would you like a shower or a drink?' = you may as well get dressed!

Same as a lady above too.. 'wow that's a huge one = aaarrrggghhh GET OUT! 

Some of my more blunt ones but said with a smile:

You don't get extra points for snogging my eyebrows.

You need to pull your foreskin back to wash huni, it's a vital part of men's health.

Please be nice to my boobs, I need them.

Xxx

[sweetmilf]

About V? What does this mean?

Haha, VC.

It was about ladies pink bits.     He pronounced it like "Vaaargina"    He says exactly what he means.  He tells me to be "honest" every single second.   

[VoluptuousCurves]

Haha, VC.

It was about ladies pink bits.     He pronounced it like "Vaaargina"    He says exactly what he means.  He tells me to be "honest" every single second.   

"Vargina"? Hahaha I'd probably end up correcting him and saying "I believe you're actually referring to my vulva. The external structures are comprised of the mons pubis, clitoris, labia majora...." I love going into pedantic mode

God if I had a customer who told me to be honest every second, he would NOT like what he heard.

I still remember the day a boyfriend said to me "What you thinking about?" He was probably expecting me to say "Oh, how much I like you!" or some soppy shit, but I said (without thinking) "I was just reflecting about the word "gentle" - did you know it's ultimately derived from old French "gentil", of noble birth? It's also given rise to "gentile" which originally meant "someone of the same tribe" but is now used to mean "someone who's not Jewish". Isn't language fascinating?!"

He looked at me deadpan and said "Think I'll get a shower and then watch the football" which is why I'll die alone

[sweetmilf]

*Sweetmilf goes in complete hysterics*. 

[LillyRose]

"Mmmm i love a nice big cock"= "I'm scared but i'm a tryer & will work with it anyway"

[LillyRose]

"Vargina"? Hahaha I'd probably end up correcting him and saying "I believe you're actually referring to my vulva. The external structures are comprised of the mons pubis, clitoris, labia majora...." I love going into pedantic mode

God if I had a customer who told me to be honest every second, he would NOT like what he heard.

I still remember the day a boyfriend said to me "What you thinking about?" He was probably expecting me to say "Oh, how much I like you!" or some soppy shit, but I said (without thinking) "I was just reflecting about the word "gentle" - did you know it's ultimately derived from old French "gentil", of noble birth? It's also given rise to "gentile" which originally meant "someone of the same tribe" but is now used to mean "someone who's not Jewish". Isn't language fascinating?!"

He looked at me deadpan and said "Think I'll get a shower and then watch the football" which is why I'll die alone

Omg looool, that's too funny! I chat random shit too when it's someone who's actually not a client. And it's cos ovbs being paid to be fake can be a little draining so have times of some very blunt/honest "what i'm thinking" ooppsyy

[lillybliss]

OOh you've done that before, it feels soooo good = for fucks sake's hurry up will you your killing me!!

[Zaracoope1983]

"Mmmm you like that? I just love sucking on a juicey cock!" = seriously any longer and my jaw will be stuck x

[sweetmilf]

  I'll be laughing next time I say that.

[Wailing Banshee]

So, are you doing anything nice with the rest of your day? = Now fuck off and go and do it, your time's up.