First trip, guy wants to write me a check...

[LoveJoyBreathe]

I have an offer in my email inbox from a guy from Sweden. He wants me to accompany him to New York for 3 days. He is requesting that I give him my full name and address so that his representative may prepay me via check before I arrive.

I obviously am wary of this. How would y'all handle this girls? He says he has 5-6 girls he keeps in this way for when he visits America 5-6 times per year. I can ask for their names to use them as references. I told him that I did not feel comfortable giving out my information to someone I know only through email though was getting some advice and would get back to him. am so grateful to be able to ask these questions of people more experienced than this newbie.

[Kit]

I wouldn't give him any personal information at all - nor would I accept a cheque.

I agree with you re: communicating via email, and I would feel uncomfortable about arranging anything further until I'd actually spoken with him and heard his voice on the phone. I personally don't see anyone I've never met until we hear each other's voices on the phone - its my number 1 screening tool.

I do all my business in the UK, and don't have experience of meeting clients abroad. I would be wary and tread very carefully, see if you can speak with him and actually have a phone (or skype) conversation before taking things further xx

[Miss_Lorrainne]

If you and this guy are based in the US I understand it's unusual to screen via phone calls and references from other workers are the main screening method. Have you seen these references? I agree skype might be a good idea. Could you get prepaid via bank transfer instead of cheque? Then you don't have to give your full name and address. Or maybe you can get a prepaid card or something and just get the representative to load it up with the fee?

[Lotus300]

1) I would not give my personal information to a man I do not know and I would not accept a check either.


2) Actually, personally I would not make a 3 day trip with someone I do not know and with whom I have not already made love.

3 days is long! It is sometimes difficult to stay in a good mood for a full hour with a client! But 3 days...

 Some clients may have an unbelievably boring conversation, some may have bad body odors, some may be boundary pushers, some may be violent, some may be drunk all the time, some have very bad characters, others speak poor French / English and it is difficult to communicate, some snore and wake you up constantly at night, etc ...

When one or more of the situations I've just described happen and you're gone for 3 days with someone ... you're going to find it very tedious and will not be able to leave easily.

I have often traveled with clients... but these were clients I knew well.

Obviously it's only my personal opinion. Some may be more daring than me.

[Tickle]

I've been offered Western Union transfers for camming. I'm wary because I am suspicious this is a con plus I don't have an anonymous prepaid card to accept money. I did read separately that a Western Union transfer is not refundable so they cannot chargeback or bounce the transaction. Other than this I don't know.

Unless they have a public profile I wouldn't trust a reference and would always want a Skype video chat to confirm I'm communicating with a real person not a fake reference.

I will never rule out an overnight or travel but don't feel ready for this myself.

[VoluptuousCurves]

How many times have you emailed back and forth/spoken on the phone/met before this scam offer appeared in your inbox?

[Mirror]

This sounds like a 'Nigerian' type scam because you've mentioned his representative.

If you do accept the cheque you need to allow it to clear fully, not the showing up on your account clearing, actually gone all the way through the bank process which I think is 10 days. Then, only then provide services or go on the trip.

If you find they've given you a cheque which is for a much larger amount, and they want a refund, DO NOT SEND ANY REFUND unless the cheque has FULLY cleared (ask your bank for the exact time) - once again this is longer than the time for it to appear on your account.

[Wailing Banshee]

Call me a cynic, but this is unlikely to be genuine especially if you are new to this- when I started I received several offers of lucrative trips abroad. It's a thing that happens and whilst I know it's exciting to be offered a load of money for a trip abroad you need to think practically.

Let's say he is genuine, it is a long time to spend with a stranger as others here have said.

Also, why would he want to risk an unknown woman himself- for all he knows you may be impossible to spend 3 days with!

If he was a genuine wealthy guy who does this regularly then he would have no qualms in paying a deposit. I wouldn't entertain insisting on a direct transfer of monies and who on earth uses cheques these days?

All this being paid by a 'representative' stuff is bollocks. It's just being said to make him sound rich and important.

Do not send any client your real details ever. End of.

[Aqua Allegoria]

I agree with other ladies. 
The whole "representative" thing is BS, just to impress you.
Asking for your real name: no way. End of story.
Paying you by cheque: sounds like a scam. 11 years ago I fell for the Western Union scam (civvie job back then), I have no clue how that guy talked me into it but by the time called a friend I was 700 euros out of pocket. Those people are really really good at it. It's their "job".
Just saying, be careful.

[BibiofLeeds]

I agree with Mirror,sounds like a typical Nigerian scam.Google it and see if it's sounds like that.In fact I think there is a thread about them on here if you stick it in the search box.

[LoveJoyBreathe]

 It was definitely a scam. He didn't respond after I told him I didn't feel comfortable and asked for references.

I am really grateful for the only traveling with someone I know and want to spend time with advice. I actually really dislike sleeping with other people, even if we are dating.

I really love the freedom this offers. To choose how and when and what I do. Thank you for sharing that with me.You are all very inspirational and appreciated.

[ana30]

This is a very common Nigerian type scam. They send you a forged check, you cash it in, then they ask you to refund 30% of it back to them. You would be laundering money and face arrest. Don't do it. If anyone wants to send you money let them do it trhough paypal or bank transfer. NO CHECKS.

[TrashAzn]

At best this is just a TW and address collector, at worse it's a scam where you'll lose money and never see it again.

[Mirror]

This is a very common Nigerian type scam. They send you a forged check, you cash it in, then they ask you to refund 30% of it back to them. You would be laundering money and face arrest. Don't do it. If anyone wants to send you money let them do it trhough paypal or bank transfer. NO CHECKS.

Sometimes they offer bankers draft, all must clear fully before doing anything including returning any 'change'.

[barbie88]

Yeh you have to be very careful . I don't do these arrangement sugar daddy stuff but my friend goes on all these arrangement sites and has a few sugar daddies I have always found men that say  they want to be my sugar daddy time wasters and I'm certainly not up for doing any arrangements . I have had similar emails over the years I don't entertain . To behonest I wouldn't Even go abroad with a regular . So many idiots and scams out there ignore Hun if he contacts you again .