New client gave me the willies, should I see him again?

[Guiltypleasure]

OP are you in South Yorkshire? I've seen a guy like this, he even held my head still and directed me to look into his eyes. He also tried to put his hand on my throat but I told him to stop. I chatted with him after the booking and he was perfectly okay, explained he had a fetish for breath play and if he came back would I be willing to do that... I was like LOL NO BRO.

Uuuug ! Wtf is breath play lol ( ok I've got an imagination ) can't stand even listening to someone's breathing unless it's someone I love and unless they're half pints they can still get on my nerves 

[VoluptuousCurves]

Breath play is consensual strangulation. It makes orgasms feel a lot more intense but obviously it's a dangerous practice - just think of the number of people who've died as a result of auto-erotic asphyxiation.

[SimplySinful]

Breath play is consensual strangulation. It makes orgasms feel a lot more intense but obviously it's a dangerous practice - just think of the number of people who've died as a result of auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Yes and normally only experienced pro-subs would offer it, but not on a first booking and it would be at a premium. No guy should be attempting to do this without prior discussion.

That?s not what the OP describes , however the placing of a hand gently on the neck I hate.  I had a guy try to do this repeatedly to me recently in a GFE booking and it made me panicky (he seemed to keep forgetting despite my saying, don?t do that). 

The hand over the mouth. Big no no, any guy who did that to me would be ejected forthwith.  I wouldn?t even allow that in pro-sub bookings.

There?s no way I?d see a guy that this again as this is a form of boundary pushing if he is doing what is not offered on your profile.

I?m very strict on this, if they want PSE, tough I don?t do that. If they want pro-sub, they pay premium for it and adhere to all boundaries there too.

[Guiltypleasure]

Breath play is consensual strangulation. It makes orgasms feel a lot more intense but obviously it's a dangerous practice - just think of the number of people who've died as a result of auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Oh I know about that ( used to work with young people who did it ) just we didn't call it that. [removed - please don't gossip about named individuals here]

It stops the blood flow and maintains an erection , they do it until their about to pass out .

I don't let anyone ever touch my throat ( good reason) and can only just wear a loose scarf, shame because I love chocker necklaces and I have some good quick release ones !

[Justine]

Some scary stories in this thread but one aspect rings true with me. The staring eyes, or in my case a man who I saw just one time and while he was clean and polite, once the money was mine and we were on the bed he did not look at me once, not once! He was sort of staring into space. I kept looking at his face more so he could not accuse me of no eye contact (I know what a joke) but also so I could try to get why he didn't want to look at me. I gave up and was glad when he was gone.

A strange one indeed.  As for hands around throat or covering my mouth I would hate that as I am in no way submissive and men know this, if one attempted to grip me by the neck I hope I would stay calm and get out of the awkward situation.  Sometimes I admire in a weird way how true sub sps do what they do.

[Guiltypleasure]

I'm laughing but shouldn't , at least you didn't get shark eyes ! No emotion like the OP had, it's mega freaky and worse if your already on edge due to your environment .

Shark eyes also makes you feel Like your gonna get eaten !

[foxylady]

wow, Gypsy, that sounds about right and no, VC no not in Yorkshire.

Simply Sinful, you have got it in one, thank you, a definite boundary pusher.  Apart from what he described he kept pushing a finger up my ass, even though I told him not to, and I don't offer anal play.

I guess at best yes, he's a boundary pusher and for that I will decline him if he comes back.

If anyone wants him, they are welcome 

Thanks so much ladies, you're so helpful as always. x

[SimplySinful]

Some scary stories in this thread but one aspect rings true with me. The staring eyes, or in my case a man who I saw just one time and while he was clean and polite, once the money was mine and we were on the bed he did not look at me once, not once! He was sort of staring into space. I kept looking at his face more so he could not accuse me of no eye contact (I know what a joke) but also so I could try to get why he didn't want to look at me. I gave up and was glad when he was gone.

A strange one indeed.  As for hands around throat or covering my mouth I would hate that as I am in no way submissive and men know this, if one attempted to grip me by the neck I hope I would stay calm and get out of the awkward situation.  Sometimes I admire in a weird way how true sub sps do what they do.

Yes I hate when no eye contact or vacant eyes. 

As to providing Sub Services, many (including myself) expressly don?t offer holding round the neck/covering the mouth, so it would still be boundary pushing and unacceptable in that type of booking.

What really matters is having clear rules and enforcing them.  If they don?t want to know then they don?t get to stay.

[SimplySinful]

wow, Gypsy, that sounds about right and no, VC no not in Yorkshire.

Simply Sinful, you have got it in one, thank you, a definite boundary pusher.  Apart from what he described he kept pushing a finger up my ass, even though I told him not to, and I don't offer anal play.

I guess at best yes, he's a boundary pusher and for that I will decline him if he comes back.

If anyone wants him, they are welcome 

Thanks so much ladies, you're so helpful as always. x

Yes, and please don?t take this as a dig, but he did so much that you expressly didn?t offer, that I probably would have told him to leave. 

I?d consider doing a warning about him on here. 

If your gut tells you not to see someone, or not to see someone again, it?s really important to listen to it.

Hopefully your next client will be lovely, that always helps.

[sweetmilf]

He was probably trying to assess what he could get away and what they are in his booking(s).  Staring at someone, menacingly, it's a telltale warning, that is, in any species.  By ignoring, you are kidding yourself.

[Guiltypleasure]

It's sometimes a sign someone's petrified too SM have you read the whole thread ?

[sweetmilf]

Just my own interpretation.  I have had my own experience. 

[foxylady]

I wouldnt describe his staring as threatening it just creeped me out x

[Gypsy]

I wouldnt describe his staring as threatening it just creeped me out x

Same with my guy who has now turned into something of a regular  I'm not sure whether these men A - Realise what they're doing and B - Know how creepy it is!

[VoluptuousCurves]

If he was boundary pushing in other ways i.e. anal play then I would be blocking him for that alone, especially if you told him multiple times to stop.

Something that I do now if I've already said "Don't do that" to whatever activity they're trying:
Completely stop all movement.
Make eye contact.
Say "I told you already that I don't accept [whatever]. Why have you just done it again?"
Keep completely silent while they stutter an apology and/or half hearted explanation ("I'm just sooo horny for you!")
If they apologise and seem repentant then I will continue the booking but say "Any repetition and I will end the booking without refund, is that clear?"
If they come across arrogant or threatening, or it's less than 5 minutes into the booking, I will say "Here is a refund, please leave. We are not suited."