Families will try emotionally blackmail and make you feel bad about what you do. They won't care about how it is making you feel. That?s what mine did when I was outed in a way nobody can imagine. Pictures and screen shots were sent of my actual profile to all my extended family. The worse thing is it was a by a family member. I tried to take my own life just because I felt bad for what my family and dad had encountered and the shame that came with it which is far worse in an asian community especially when it was my dad facing it all on his now with mum having passed away when I was a kid.
I quickly realised that it wasn?t worth it. Not once they thought or cared about how I felt and not one person stepped forward to say they wanted to help me financially or ask me if I was in any trouble. I had to distance myself from the stigma and discrimination I encountered on top of that we face daily as escorts.
My family said similar things that I was damaged and used goods, nobody would ever want to marry me etc etc. I lost my career, family, some friends and also a relationship I was in at the time all because of the effect this had on me. I had 2 years of counselling coming to terms with everything as there was much more that went on too. But the best thing to come out of it all is I've learnt to not let the stigma effect me and no more sneaking around or fake friends. I'm now a free spirit who doesn't give a fuck about what anyone else thinks of my work. Sometimes you have to be a little selfish especially when it comes to your emotional and mental health and the long term consequences.
I would distant myself and focus on yourself for a while and when they?ve come round they can reach out to you. The more you chase after them the more they will criticise you and the more pressure you will feel, thus more depressed. The right time to reach out would be when they see you as a daughter first before anything else. If they can?t do that then it?s not worth quitting something you want to do for their sake.
I know this sounds harsh but trust me I learned the hard way and I?m emotionally much stable and now have a good relationship with my family after 3 years of not speaking, albeit not the same but still better than one can hope. Put your health first and your mum knows where she is if she needs you. If it turns out to be cancer then you can cross that bridge when it comes to it. Families always come round eventually. Let the shock sink in, stay strong and put your health first. There's always light at the end of the tunnel and when it shines it will shine brightly.
Big hugs. Pm me if you need anything.
Topic: Outed to family - need advice (Read 4441 times)