Relationship driving me crazy, should I end it?

[sashaX]

When I first began escorting I was certain that I did not have time for a relationships and that relationships equal heartache and complications so were best avoided. I was working happily as an escort, fitting it around my other "life", meeting up with friends and family who knew nothing about my job and who would probably all be shocked if they knew what I did. At no time did I ever feel out of control or like I needed more.

A few months ago  met a guy in the "real" world and somehow we got into a relationship, I told myself it was nothing serious and that we could just have fun together and he did not have to know about my job. Being with him was great, he made me laugh and feel stupidly happy. I didn't care that he didn't spoil me, compliment me or take me out to nice restaurants. In fact it felt kind of good when I spoilt him from time to time. I tried not to care that the time I spent with him meant a huge loss of income, as he was starting to spend more and more time at my place.  I told him I did some temping for an agency (not escorting) and that I could work when I liked. Then he asked if he could stay with me for a while as he had to move, I agreed, but the time ended up being longer than planned so he ended up staying for 2 weeks, meaning I couldn't work.

In the time we've spent together I  have started to feel like I need him and am unable to switch off my emotions, but I don't want to give up my job. I don't see how we can  be together anymore and it's driving me crazy thinking about it. I am actually quite an emotional person once I get close to someone although I have done a good job of switching off my emotions for some time, until now. I know he likes me but I do not think he sees me as a real girlfriend and is not really serious about me, which should be good as I cannot afford for it to be more than a fling. I think I should end it before either of us get hurt but am finding it really hard to do it. I don't even think he would be that upset if I broke it off with him, although he would miss the sex.